~?~

What goes up, must come down.... Can you guess what I'm doing today?

Textbooks

• Why are textbooks so expensive?
• What happened to the good ole' days were they provided your books for you?
• Should it really cost that much to buy a used book?
• AND what's up with the Razorback Hog store commercials that say "when you buy stuff from their store, it helps reduce textbook prices for college students" I don't believe it!

It's almost that time of the year again, and it stresses me out..... I hate spending an extra $500 on books, they already get enough money from me!

Note to Self:

Always make sure an object fits inside the envelope you choose before writing on the envelope at the Post Office. It will save you both time and money. AND YOU WONT LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT WHEN YOU CHECKOUT..... yes I was the idiot that did this!

Christmas 2009

As I get older, I quickly realize how "different" Christmas truly becomes. On a positive, as an adult you better understand the true meaning of Christmas and this means a lot more to you and you don't "accidently" forget the true meaning of Christmas when you first wake up in the morning. But, on the sad note, as I get older, I realize that adults spend so much time, money and energy shopping for the perfect gift.... and then it gets ripped open and thrown to the side. How depressing! All that effort and it's just gone in a matter of minutes!

Overall, we had a wonderful Christmas at my house this year. I guess everyone was on their best behavior this year, because SANTA did pretty good!

On Christmas Eve, I had the opportunity to spend time with Trey and his family. After a long drive to Cincinnati, we ate a snacked on a variety of dips, sandwiches, and desserts..... oh- and don't forget the lil' smokies! yummy! = ) After that we opened presents (ABC order.. like that idea-I don't have to wait very long!) Shortly after we were done opening presents, the power went off! We're not sure of it really did, or if that was the cue to leave! But, due to the bad weather outside and no lights, we decided to hit the road. Let's just say it took even longer to get home! The roads were covered in snow, and the windshield wipers kept freezing up! So, after several stops to pound off the ice, we finally made it!

When I got home, mom and dad were still up. I informed them that they did not have to play "Santa" anymore and they could go to bed at a decent hour on Christmas Eve, but they wanted to make sure all their children were safe first. (Still waiting on Kirby to get home too)

On Christmas morning, I was going to attempt to help mom cook breakfast, but I wasn't much help! Maybe if I would have had my cowgirl apron Becke' got me a little sooner, I would have been more help! Around 9:30, Nana & Grandad showed up and we ate a wonderful brunch: Biscuits & Gravy, Keish, Fruit, and Ham. It was all very delicious! After we ate and did the dishes, we sat down as a family and opened presents. I hope everyone got everything they wanted!

After presents, we played BINGO. It was a lot of fun. It's nice to be able to sit down and play games as a family. AND to make it even better, we had BINGO prizes! For some reason if you mention the word prize, people are more willing to play! HA!

***Later, I took a nap, I was BORED and TIRED! Which is very rare for me (the napping part, not the bored) I hardly ever take a nap, but it sure did feel good! ****

That night we headed over to Karleen's and had some more wonderful food & NOODLES. She makes the best noodles (and sugar cookies). After we got done eating, we all gathered in the garage and sang Christmas songs. Kirby played the guitar, Marica played the piano and Chuck played the banjo and everyone else sang, or attempted too! I think we might make this a new family tradition!

Well.... that sums up my Christmas, I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and may your New Year be filled with lot's of Cheer!

Hannah Grace Crumby

Hannah passed away this morning at 3:18.

Please keep the Crumby family in your thoughts in prayers not only today, but every day in the future.

Hallelujah (Light Has Come)

Hannah Grace Crumby is a beautiful, talented, amazing, intelligent, and caring four year old girl who was diagnosed with Leukemia on September 15. Since then the Crumby family has spent many long days at Arkansas Children's Hospital supporting Hannah and giving her the love and treatment she needs. Their family has kept their faith and remained strong during this battle that Satan has thrown in their face. They have not let his evil stand in their way, they have continued to fight with God as their shield.

I heard a Christmas song by Barlowgirl for the first time tonight, Hallelujah (Light Has Come).

Knowing that this song represents Mary and our Savior Jesus, I also felt like the words supported Hannah as well. The song starts off saying, "Heaven sent you to me, All the worlds been praying" Hannah was a huge blessing on James and Kimberly's life four years ago. They prayed for the health an safety of this child, and now, people from all over the world, that do not even know this family have been praying for Hannah and that God will give her the strength she needs to fight if it is in his will. "But who am I, That here tonight, I hold the one, Who'll Bring us Life" When I heard this verse, I think of a beautiful picture where Kimberly is holding her beautiful daughter, not knowing that Hannah's condition has brought life to so many people. As a four year old, she has touched the lives of so many people, and made people's faith stronger and more dependable.

"A Promise for those who believe" Only God knows what the future holds for Hannah Grace, but we pray that he will give this family that believes, the promise they need. For they do believe, and they have left it up to God, it's all in his hands.

"So praise to God on high, He has heard our cry" We have prayed and we have cried, now all we can do is rely on God and let his will be done.

I know that Hannah Grace was placed in this world for a reason, and she has already touched the lives of so many people. I pray that she will be given the opportunity to touch many more lives and impact others as much as she as impacted mine.

I do believe that all things happen for a reason.... WHY? I can't answer that and if I could then my life would be much easier, along with many others. I've mentioned this before, and I will say it again: It always seems like when we are suffering and praying so hard for someone or something, every song we hear, goes back to and supports that situation.

Visit: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/hannahgracecrumby/journal

Listen to this song @ imeem.

Hallelujah [Light Has Come] by BarlowGirl

Hmmm my Baby
Heaven sent you to me
All the worlds been praying
Who will Save?
But who am I
That here tonight
I hold the one
Who'll Bring us life

Hallelujah,
We've been found
A child is born
To save us now
Hallelujah light has come
A Savior who will set us free
A Promise for those who believe

Do you hear the Angels
Sing for you my baby
Men and kings have come to
Bow to you
But here in my arms

So close to me
The son of God
Now all can see

Hallelujah We've been found
A child is born to save us now
Jesus Halleluiah light has come
A savior set us free

So praise to God on high
He has heard our cry

The Crumby's made the decision to have Hannah removed from the ventilator at 9:30 a.m. on Sunday December 6. Hannah is still fighting and will continue to fight with God's strength. At this point all we can do is follow the Crumby's footsteps and FROG - Fully Rely On God.

After hearing Hallelujah (and feeling a little sad) I turned the station from KLRC to country, thinking that might help, and then the song "One More Day" by Diamond Rio came on. At this point, I feel like that's what I'm asking for each and everyday, Lord if it is meant to be, then let Hannah spend Just one more day, please. Everyday, we strive for another day.

Listen at imeem

One More Day by Diamond Rio

Last Night I had a crazy dream
Wish was granted just for me,
It could be for anything
I didn't ask for money, or a mansion in Malibu
I simply wished for one more day with you

One more day, One more time
One more sunset maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again; I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you

[Oh one more day]

First thing I'd do is pray for time to crawl
I'd unplug the telephone, and keep the TV off
I'd hold you every second, say a million I Love You's
Thats what I'd do, with one more day with you

One more day, One more time
One more sunset maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again; I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you

One more day, One more time
One more sunset maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again; I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day....
Leave me wishing still, for one more day....
Leave me wishing still, for one more day....
With you

Thank you & Please continue to pray....

Christmas Music

I just added some Christmas Music to my blog, so if you want to get into the Holiday Cheer ... stop by and listen!

I love Christmas Music, it's so peaceful, relaxing and really makes you stop and think about all the wonderful things God has given us in life.

I hope you have a Wonderful Wednesday!

Can I get a whoop whoop?

What an exciting day.... Today is the last day of class before Thanksgiving Break! YAY!

I am looking forward to having the rest of the week off..... even though it will be spent doing lot's of homework and projects! Oh well.... I can finally see the light at the end of tunnel. I think I just might make it! Whoop Whoop! = )

Past Due

Ok, so I have heard from many people that I am past due on blogging and that I need to put up a new post....

And YES, I agree, but there's not much going on in my life right now.... HINT: DULL DAY DIARIES! But, I will scrape and dig for something!

School is CRAZY right now. I have never felt so overwhelmed with school before. I have soooo many BIG projects due (around the same time) so any "free" time I have, I've been working on those. And that's what I've been doing today, minus the break to clean house and blog!

Kiwi doesn't even like homework anymore! MAMA... PLEASE STOP.... pay attention to me! Look at the face- that's so sad!

A couple of weeks ago Trey and I headed out to Devil's Den to go horseback riding and it was amazing! It was a great opportunity to just get away for the day and enjoy the beautiful world that God so graciously gave us. And the weather was perfect! We left his house around 8:00 am and did not return till around 6:30. We packed some snacks, drinks and lunch and called it a day! I had never rode horses out there before, but I highly recommend it! But I have been caving out there and that's a blast too! Devil's Den is a great place to escape too if you don't want to go far or spend a lot of money! (Well, it's not far for me! )

Halloween & Razorback Game Day @ Sassy's!

Ummmmm..... My Birthday..... Ya, that was a couple of months ago.... OOOPS!

Beautiful flowers from my sister and the cake was from my mommy! YAY!

Some school Projects.....

A FOOD CAR

JACKDAW PROJECT

Please continue to pray for Hannah Grace Crumby.

The BIG 20

Wow, I can't believe it has already been 20 months. It's hard to face the fact that you have been gone for 20 months. I was talking to a dear friend the other day that had lost his sister to cancer 10 years ago. He said it still seems like yesterday that it happened, and that she was still there. 20 months seems long enough, I can't imagine looking back 10 years from now, you would be(should be) 36. That's the age mom was when she had me. Would you also be having a baby? Would you have been married and having lots beautiful babies? Would you still be working at the Gas Company? I wonder what you would have been doing 10 years from now, but even more I wonder what you would be doing right now. Would we have gone to work out tonight, gone tanning together, or would we have skipped out and went and got ice cream instead? It's hard to say, but I do know things would be different if you were still here.

I broke down last night, I'm not sure why. I just felt sad, but more than sad, I felt angry. Mad, mad at you, mad at the world, mad at pain and sorrow, mad at LIFE. Mad that I lost my beautiful sister, mad that an innocent 4 year old is having to stay at Arkansas Chlildren's Hospital because she has cancer, mad because school is about to get the best of me, mad because I don't know if I will be a good teacher one day, mad because I can't work up the courage to go to the doctor, mad because I feel like I'm letting myself go, and mad because I was MAD. I hate being mad, and upset. I hate it for myself, and I hate it for others. And there's nothing worse then people asking you what's wrong, or telling you to cheer up. Do you tell them what's really on your mind, and scream at them, or do you just smile and say nothing, I'm fine. A part of me just want's to yell at the person, and say what do you thinks wrong? I lost my sister 20 months ago, that doesn't mean I should be over it, am I not allowed to be sad? But then you have to realize that not everyone has been thru a tragedy that changes their life. I started crying last night with a few tears running down my cheek, I tried to stop them, because I was not in the right place to start being an emotional basket-case, but I couldn't stop them. They were filling up my eyes and forcing their way out faster then I could control them. My few tears turned into a hard cry that lasted for hours. I honestly haven't cried that hard in a long time. I actually haven't cried over you in quite a while. I have still felt angry towards you, and felt like you do not deserve my tears, but I guess that can only build up inside you for so long, until it comes bursting out. With tears and clinched fists, I didn't know what to do, so I just let it all out. Afterwards I felt much better, but now I feel like I did 20 months ago, missing my best friend, and wondering why you left me. I don't know which is worse feeling this way, or being mad at you, but not feeling as much pain.

After you passed away, I began to keep a journal, I only made it through about 10 pages, and then I stopped. I'm not sure why. I think because I hated re-living my last day with you, and your death in my head. But, now I wish I would have followed through with my writings, because soon, one day I will forget all the details, and wish I would have wrote them down. I am already becoming unaware of all the small things that happened that day, but the little bit of information I did write down, helped me remember. One of the things I wrote down, and I do remember saying this over and over on my way home that day was "Ki-Ki if you're not dead then I'm going to kill you myself for scaring me like this" Why would I say such a thing? Knowing I would NEVER kill my sister, or anyone, but there was already that anger from the minute I talked to my mom, until now. There has always been that anger trapped inside of me, and I don't know if it will ever go away. At times it might fade, and fall to the back of my mind, but I don't think it will ever disappear. No matter how many times I pray, I will always be upset with you for leaving me that day, and not sticking around to be my big sister, my best friend, my one and only friend.

I still love you more than ever and I'm sorry for being so angry towards you these past months.

These are words you probably do not want to hear, but sometimes it just feels better to let things out and try to move on to another day.

Payless?

I hadn't been to Payless in a LONG time, so I decided to check out their website. Oh my goodness! Have you been there lately or to the store? What happened to PAY LESS? I use to find the cutest shoes there, for the best price, especially when it was BOGO (Buy one get one 1/2 off) But their prices of shoes have definitely gone up. Is this because of the economy too? = / The prices of shoes are going up as well? Oh no, I am in BIG trouble now!

Here are some adorable shoes at Payless, but $50? I never remember shoes being $50 in there! But I guess if you get one 1/2 off then that's only $25, but still $75 for 2 pairs of shoes seems a little high for the good ole' Payless.

HappY BirthdaY EriC

Funny Eric...The Look.....
Good Dad Eric...

Happy Birthday to my favorite brother-in-law.... (ok, my only brother-in-law... haha)

Anyways.... I hope you have a wonderful Birthday... see you this weekend! = )

Free Photo Shoot... FREEE

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Contest ends on Thursday, October 8th at 8 am. Random.org will assist with selecting the happy winner! Come back on Thursday to see if you are the lucky one! (Out of towners can enter if they are willing to come to me for their session.)




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19 months & 10 days - and you're still gone

Precious Sister

Sometimes I still hear the sound of your voice.
I wish you were still here with me, but you had no choice.
I know an Angel held you as your body said goodbye.
But that doesn’t stop my heart from breaking.....
........“I miss you and I cry”.
No one can believe that you are really gone,
Our hearts are broken and our spirits moan.
“She was to young”, I’ve heard people say,
“Why did she, have to die this way?”
I try not to be anger, I kneel and I pray,
Asking God to be with us, as we face each day.
I always try to give Mom an extra kiss,
To make up for a little girl, she will always miss.
I understand everyone's emptiness and their sorrow too,
Because, “My precious sister..... we all miss you“.
I know you are happy in Heaven above,
Surrounded by the Angels and all their love.
But today on earth, my heart still grieves,
Because you are no longer here to talk with me”.
I will look toward Heaven, for I know I will see
A Star that will suddenly glow big and bright,
It will be my sister smiling....
..... and watching over me.

This poem was written by: Teresa Shelton Bright

Happy Birthday to YOU and YOU...

Happy Birthday to my Brother, Devin!

Happy Birthday to my dear friend, Shelly!

AND HAPPY BIRHTDAY TO ME TOMORROW!

(I can't believe it's that time of the year again)

Weekend Wrap ^

I love it when my siblings come visit me! On Thursday night when I got home, my brother was here. I love it when he comes home, because he's always awake when I get home at night, so I have someone to talk to for a while before I go to bed!

On Friday, my mom, my brother, and I got to hand out and spend some quality time together. We went and ate at Olive Garden, and then went to IO Metro and Hobby Lobby. (Or I guess we drug Kirby there) But it was still fun. I had to work Friday night, but Becke' and Eric and the boy's came into town for the Razorback game. (We wont' go there, sad loss) I didn't get to see them on Friday, so they were nice enough to come and eat at Sassy's on Saturday, since I had to work a double. Thanks for coming to see me! It always makes work better when you get to see people you know, especially your own family!

On Sunday we celebrated my birthday & Sammy-who-who's birthday. We had home made creamy chicken enchiladas (at my request) and delicious confetti cupcakes.... why are those soooo good? Becke' and the BOYS didn't get to stick around long, because they had to get back so Eric could teach a class.

Funny Story: I guess mom took the boys to go see the meatball movie, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. Well Sam, came and hopped in bed with me Sunday morning (and Becke', they brought me a play-doh birthday cake that they had made! How sweet) Well, were laying there, and Sam looks up and says, WOW, LOOK AT ALL THOSE MEATBALLS, THEY'RE HUGE. It was so funny, he was referring to a picture in my room, and then looked at another picture and said there's more meatballs.

VERY IMPORTANT: PLEASE PRAY

Hannah Crumby, is a beautiful, smart, loving four year old girl in my Sunday School Class. This past week, she got really sick, so her parents took her to the doctor. They ran some tests (blood tests) and went ahead and transferred her to the Children's hospital. From there, they diagnosed her with Leukemia. Please pray for the Crumby family, that God will provide the best treatment plan for Hannah and that he will give them the strength and courage they need to get through this difficult time.

Thank you for prayers.

FYI: It's almost that time of the year again, where Northwest Arkansas is extremely crowded.... Prepare yourself for the 10th Annual Bike, Blues & BBQ.

Can you believe this is already the 10th one? I couldn't!

Happy Anniversary!

Happy SIX years to the best boyfriend in the world! These past years have been a blessing and I look forward to spending many more GREAT years together. Love you!

What are the odds...

Of stepping on a FROG in your own driveway?

And NOT knowing what that squishy thing is under your foot.

So when you move your foot, you realize you just squashed a FROG.

The good news is -- He Lived! He hopped away very slowly, and it took him a minute to get himself UNSTUCK from the ground.... I know, isn't that horrible.

The bad news... something long and stringy came out of him.... guts? or did he go to the bathroom?

I'm SORRY Mr. FROG.

Not sure what that is.....

Happy Birthday Sammy-Who-Who !!!

Today is your SpEcIaL day, and I hope it is a GREAT one! I can't believe you are 4 years old. You are turning into such a charming little boy with a wonderful personality. Happy Birthday SAM. I love you so much!

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